Forever Whatever Whenever

http://www.adhousebooks.com/misc/gallery.html

Yes. I am busy most days. Yes. I don't have what you would call a life. I have not gone to a pub in the last five years. Never taken a four day break, except to attend a wedding or a funeral. I do not have a passport and I do not want to travel to Europe our Dubai. I only read FB and rarely seed FB. The only time I spend on doing anything other than working is writing and yes I know, I am selfish and I write because it gives me an alternate sense of identity.

I am a small fry, a nobody. I know that when I die of stress or heart attack or brain hemorrhage, I will not be called a martyr by my Board of Directors. No resolution will be passed to install my half butt near the parking lot. No sparrow poop for me either! All I will do is proudly go and stand in queue of millions of dead donkeys with broken backs in heaven. And bray my prayers loudly to neutered angels who can't probably play substitute to dear lass Sunny Leonne. And now don't ask me who she is. I know her very closely, though she has the right to disagree!! Poor she.
What do you want me to do? Live for you? What would that really mean? No really, what would that really mean? Write me a few lines, tell me that it will be different from my todays. Tell me that we will dance around trees and all bills will get paid. Tell me that there will no boss, no clients, no team members and no targets. I have a better idea. Marry me, let me be your wife!


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PS: This writing is not judgmental of wives or non working women. It is just funny easy reading.

Keep It Simple Stupid!

That you light up my desktop with your Monalisa smile, and look at me from files and windows in which you hide, is no surprise.

When night falls and it is time to sleep, I love to blow a kiss your way, hoping that I have not missed.  That wild draft of wily air which fondled your locks, was my gentle kiss goodnight. Whoosh . . . Goodnight.

Men Like Them

I started blogging in 2004 on rediff. I exited because by 2006 or so there were more of aphrodisiac promos than serious blogs on rediff. Lately, they have revamped the looks, but the content remains just as cluttered and stupid. I am pasting below one of my very first blogs in as is where is condition. Much has changed in the years that have passed, my job, the place I live and most of my life; but Sebastine remains my favorite :)

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[16/06/2004 07:42:14] | [rajeshkmr7@rediffmail.com ]


Men like them


This is my first week into the blog world. Three days since I first posted my poems of love and longing, I have now decided to put up some characters I come across in my life and who are radically different from others .


I am a plantation executive and thus unlike others of my ilk, my lot is piled with the bluest or the blue collared workmen. Six estates and six years down the line this job and the interent has together finished off all poetry in me. Consistent onslaught from a highly unionized workforce who knows their rights and conveniently forgets their duties have thoroughly grated into the softness that lies within a poet. Plantations has turned me into a prickly, sharp edged, irritated bugger. I hope to blog my way back into spiritual health. Let us see. 


The people you will meet in here are all true to life and most of them are still very much alive and kicking or being kicked at. Let me start with my kaliyar days.




Supervisor Sebastian


Think about a 6 feet 3 inches giant with no paunch and a extremely tall gait. And then think of him as 38 years old and extremely cunning. This is a story about how Sebastian whom my manager considered as the worst Supervisor on the estate turned out to be the best. This is the story of Sebastian who stopped hiding behind field boundary walls at the sound of a Royal Enfield bike and started to do some real work and continues to do so. This is a true story.

Searching for Sebastian

Sebastian endeea’ I would ask. “Ariyatilla saare” pat came the reply. “Sebaaasteeeaaaannn” I would scream, but as usual no Sebastian would ever appear. The first few weeks at the estate were like nothing I could ever imagine. Sebastian was the supervisor in charge of Field N69 and N70. Field N69 and N70 of the Number two division were a mountaineers delight. And if all is well at the estate I have decided that by the end of the millenium year, I would start practicing bungee jumping in one of its quite corners. But before that I decided to find out Sebastian. 


‘Sheela , Supervisor Sebastian Endeeye”, (Sheela,where is supervisor Sebastian.) ‘”Ippol ivide ondarunnallo saaarree, thande angottu poyee”( He was right here a moment ago sir, he has gone that way). The first two weeks I swallowed this bait hook , line and sinker. And I went all through the field, round and round every block , asking every tapper-but as usual no Sebastian would appear and they will all conveniently direct me to the next steep of the hill.


Tired and worn out and sweating like those ugly looking meaty things, I would reach the weighment shed by the weighment time, and there sitting like a lord on his cement bench will be the and the only -Supervisor Sebastian! “Sebastian, for gods sake where were you!”-no answer, only an old Prem Chopra smile. I repeated the question, and still that smile. And a moment before my brown face would turn some impossible combinations in pastel, Sebastian squeaked:” Saare (almost sounding like saale!) sahipinde bhasha ariyattillallo!”(Sir, I do not follow the white man’s tongue.) I let go at that for I knew that he knew what I knew- that he was having a go at me! Next day I waited for Sebastian at the entrance of the field for I wanted to see how he could slip away this time. Every one came but no Sebastian came, and finally when he did come, he muttered what sounded like a good morning saarre and gave a salute that could have passed for a slap had I been closer.
“ Sebastian, come show me around the field and introduce me to the tappers” I said in the vernacular. And then I realized that I had landed at one of the most dangerous places on earth. I had my doubts on the very first day when a senior 
introduced me to a few shady looking characters who were referred to as ‘supervisors’, and now all the doubts were coming true. “ This is T.K.Joseph sir, we call him charayam Saju, he has murdered three people and is charged for at least 18 cases of murder and violence.” But Sebastian, he looks so meek.. almost like a lamb- I reiterated. “ Eeiiialla saaarree, his looks are deceptive, only yesterday he chopped the hands off Vannaparam Basheer.” I let it go at  that, I thought that maybe Raju had a special affinity towards chopping hands and heads. The next tapper I was introduced to was Kaduvakandam Suresh. “ Sir, he is the best tapper in this section, he can tap 500 trees at one go. Wonderful Sebastian, I said, give this chap a hundred rupees if he brings more than 35 kilos today.” At the sound of a hundred I could suddenly see Sebastian’s eyes go watery and bright, he gave a slurp-y licking to his lips and promptly pocketed the hundred. Nobody was needed to tell me where or to whom that hundred went.


Walking through the blocks Sebastian taught me tons of new things about the rubber tree. At the end of the week I knew that there was something very very important called “Thunder Pressure” which is most strong during early mornings. As also there are things like “Plucking Index”, “Tapping Density” and a terrible condition called “ Brown Blast.” 


Those were my first days at the estate. It was an altogether different experience. For the thousand four hundred or so people who lived upon the estate, life moved at a different pace. Here I was among people to whom life was full of small and important things. When their manager  sported a beard, it was the topic for the week, and when he shaved his beard it was enough news for another week. For them the powers and the weaknesses of Harrisons was manifested in a few ordinary men with extraordinary powers. Supervisor Sebastian was only one of them. And there was a ritual upon the estate, an unsaid, unwritten code of evaluation. Sebastian’s eccentricities and his seeming stubbornness was his way of evaluating the new Assistant Manager.


However, all this seems to have happened so long ago, With the passage in time, things seemed to get corrected by itself. I found in Sebastian one of the most hard working, diplomatic and trustworthy supervisors I was to meet. He is with me as a trusted lieutenant is. And we share a common aspiration on work. We together work for a time when:


Our fields are clean, and free of weeds;
Our trees are healthy, free of wounds;
There is bark to go when the year is done;
And it crops and crops like never before

To The World's Favorite Trouble Shooter

Sam

Dear Sam,

You are the closest to what Santa can get if he were living amidst us today, hmm! …funny that I never checked your id, you might be HIM!

Sa(m)ta?

There are so many reasons for me to be thankful of your presence in my daily life that I won’t start being a bore. 

Thank you for being a groucho to all the right people and a saint and close friend to all the wrong people (including me!)

You are a friend, a guide, a leader a driver and a coach all at once, no wonder you take so much space :) Because of you, I have lesser worries to worry after, because of you, my balding crown still has shades of black! 

Thank you so much for being such a wonderful human being. It is a pleasure having you walk this earth at the same time as me. Prayers and Wishes for all years to come :)

Rajesh

Happy 2010..11

Peter Ballem (Best Boss 2010 winner *)

Dear Sir,

A lot of us look forward to a new year to make resolutions, convey good wishes and express our joy at the miracle we call daily living. I thought I would use the last day of 2010 to do the same. Thank you for making a wonderful difference in my life by just being yourself. 

When Lehman Brother’s lost it, I had you to keep me propped up; when the world was falling apart all around us and the only news was generally bad news, your presence was a great anchor to me. 

Thank you for being kind and listening, wish I has these attributes too :)  Thank you for being candid and yet retaining your composure, wish I could get some of those skills too :)

Thank you for being my favorite crib buddy and going through yards of rants almost every day. Thank you for suffering me, I assure you, this will continue, (after all, life is full of suffering)!

You are a lot of things I wanted to be, but then there is this wonderful you… so I continue (happily) being myself! Love, Prayers and a Happy New Year.

Rajesh
 

*The details of the competition is confidential :)

When People Come Together

It is amazing what people can do when they come together. I am in Belgaum for the last four days managing some recruiting related activities on behalf of one of our clients. Shivanand is our local employee based out of Belgaum and his presence in Belgaum was probably the only reason why I took up this assignment with confidence.

We had four high energy students from local management campuses who acted as full time volunteers, two senior faculty with industry experience in the interview panel, a very co-operative campus that lent us space and office staff for infra management, the district administration who readily provided us with police personnel and the district employment office who had helped us with press releases and space during the initial selection related processes. The interviews went off seamlessly and ended peacefully an hour ago.

Do so many varied entities come together and work together perfectly all the time… I guess no. They came together because of three reasons. First being Shivanand himself. Shiva is a highly networked youngster with a very charming temperament. People like to do things for him. Second being the brand image of our client (which is one of the largest corporate houses in the country) and finally, my firms brand image. Most people who know my firm is aware of its commitment towards the young Indians. Those who came together also wanted to be a part of this mission in their own little ways. Needless to say, for such exercises to pass peacefully, HIS grace is also very important.

Safe to say, it all went off peacefully and hopefully, we will have opportunities to work closely with all these wonderful people over the years to come.